Final Review

For the seniors in our community, school is done. Graduation parties and ceremonies will fill the next few weeks. At the sunrise service on Easter this year, Meri shared with us a word coined by John Koenig. A writer, and a poet, he realized in college as that there were emotions he wanted to describe in his writing for which there just weren’t words. So, he started making words, finally compiling them and publishing them as The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows. For most graduates, and their parents and families, and friends, graduation comes with an obscure blend of joy and satisfaction with grief and fear. Meri offered John Koenig’s word “Etterath” to name the feeling. “Etterath” refers to “the feeling of emptiness after a large, arduous process is finally complete – ending a school year, planning a celebration, or achieving some goal you have been working toward for years – when they are over, you are left standing on top of the world, but with an odd sense of emptiness, anxious to know what hill your heart will lead you to climb next.”

I imagine that between Easter and Pentecost, the disciples were experiencing a bit of etterath. After his death and resurrection, Jesus appeared to the disciples over a period of several weeks. In that time, they were transitioning from disciples to apostles. Disciples are students. Apostles are teachers. On the 50th day after Easter, Pentecost, they “graduated” – they received the Holy Spirit. But, we don’t know exactly how long it was after Easter and before Pentecost that Jesus ascended, we celebrate his ascension on the 40th day after Easter but that day was chosen for its symbolism and not its accuracy. During those weeks that Jesus was appearing to them, he tried to prepare the disciples for what was next. He would no longer be physically with them. And, he reviewed with them what he had taught them about the kingdom of God.

I am guessing that some of the disciples were ready to take charge. We’ve got this, Jesus. We humans have a tendency, it’s called pride, to act like everything is up to us. They were brainstorming and creating strategic plans to get this world whipped into shape. Probably started with “take down Rome, put Christians in power.”

I’m guessing there was another group who were about ready to throw their hands up in the air at the whole waste of the last 3 years of their lives. They gave up their careers, their families, their futures…for what? Why doesn’t God hurry up and fix this broken world. Stop the tragedies, prevent the accidents, take down the bullies and tyrants, eradicate disease, establish justice and give a good dose of it to those who deserve it.

Jesus taught another way. New Testament scholar NT Wright says, “God’s sovereign rule over the world isn’t quite such a straightforward thing as people sometimes imagine. Would people really like it if God were to rule the world directly and immediately, so that our every thought and action were weighed, and instantly judged and if necessary punished…?” No. God has given us free will, which means we have the ability to make decisions and experience consequences, and because we have that space, we have to wait for God to act. Perhaps Jesus went back over his kingdom teaching one more time because he knew how much the disciples didn’t like to wait…and, let’s be honest, we don’t like waiting, either.

Jesus’ parables are all about waiting. I know most of you have heard these stories more than once. So had the disciples, but it was final review time. Before Jesus ascended, he reviewed his kingdom teachings one more time with them. A farmer goes out to sow some seed. He starts by broadcasting it, then work those seeds into the soil. Then he has to wait. The same is true with making disciples. We broadcast seeds of love, work them a bit into the soil of care and met needs and community, and wait. What happens next isn’t up to us. Some will take root and flourish and others will not. And when we turn the soil, we are also turning in the tares, the thorny weeds that choke out the good plants. They are going to grow, and they will choke some of the good plants out. But, we can’t tell the difference in the good wheat and the weeds. So, we have to wait and let God sort it out. Interestingly, Jesus told the same parable with fish as his example – the fisherman brings in all the fish caught in the net. It’s not the fisherman’s job to sort out the good fish from the bad. It’s not our job to sort the people who come to be part of our field, or who are part of our catch. It is our job to sow seeds and go fishing.

And even if what we do is small, it is not insignificant. A mustard seed is tiny, but can grow until it can support a bird and her nest. New life can be nurtured in its branches. A little leaven, a tiny pinch of yeast, can transform dough so that instead of baking and getting hard, dense bread the dough expands and becomes structured with air pockets, and the bread that bakes is soft and airy. A little makes a big impact. I tend to think of a bucket of water being filled with drops of water, no drop insignificant. We just had Trike-a-thon with the preschoolers helping them learn that if we all do what we can, together we can make a big difference. They raised $7365! I did a little math. Did you know that if every person here today gave $5.50 toward Rise Against Hunger we would meet our fundraising goal? This winter, Farmington Presbyterian provided shelter for nearly 70 people who otherwise would have spent the night outside trying to get warm in a cardboard box or under a bridge. Some of you cooked or bought food for their dinner, some of you came and ate with them and helped with the evening activities, some of you spent the night…it might not have seemed like a big sacrifice at the time, but it made a big difference. One of our guests recognized me when he came in, but I didn’t remember him. When I sat down to eat, I sat across from him. He said we met when he was homeless in 2017, but then had been able with the help of Room in the Inn staff to get a job, save up, get an apartment. And he lived there, working at Fresh Market for 4 years. Then he was offered a job at Starbucks, where he would make more, so he started working there, for 2 years. Then he had an opportunity to change to Target. Interacting with him, it was clear that the young man has some challenges with cognitive functioning and social interaction. Something happened at Target. He didn’t say what. What he told me was that he quit and he didn’t want to work anywhere again where he had to interact with customers. He was clearly very hurt by whatever had taken place. And he was now homeless again because of it. I couldn’t change his situation. But, I could listen. I could care. So, I said something to him like, “I’m sorry someone hurt you. It’s really hard to stick with a job where you are unhappy. But, I always figure I should look for a job and tough it out at my old job until I have a new one.” It was like a lightbulb went off. “That’s a good idea! I had never thought of it like that before. When I get a job, I should keep it until I have a better job.” A drop in the bucket…a seed that will hopefully grow…

Why, though? Why should we sacrifice when we are comfortable? I can’t tell you what it is like to be in that moment and see that bucket starting to fill up, to see that seed sprout, that dough rising. But I can tell you that there is nothing better. That’s what Jesus reviewed with the disciples, his students, as they became apostles, his teachers. The Kingdom of God is like finding a field with a treasure or a pearl that is exquisite – it is worth giving up everything you have to be part of it – to put out the nets and plant the seeds and leaven the dough in people’s lives, knowing that God takes it from there. There’s nothing better.